The Ministry of an Elder's Wife

Even though I do believe that the Scriptures teach that a married woman’s primary ministry is to her family, that does not mean that in being a helper to your husband, you lose your personal identity.  When the Lord Jesus saved you, He gave you a spiritual gift, and that gift was given to you for the purpose of “equipping the saints for the work of ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ.”  (Ephesians 4:12) 

So, I’d like for us to think about our personal ministries.  You may be a gifted teacher and the ministry God has given you is leading Bible studies for women.  That is a wonderful ministry in your local church- helping the women grow in their relationship with the Lord and equipping them to better honor and serve Him.  That is a tremendous help and encouragement to the elders.  But it is not the ministry that God has for every elder’s or full-time worker’s wife.  Learning this has been such a help to me. 

The ministry that the Lord has equipped me for is working with children.  It is what I enjoy and the place where I see the Lord using me most effectively.  But because of other people’s expectations and my own misconceptions, I thought that when my husband was recognized as an elder that I, as an elder’s wife, had to give up teaching children to work with the women.  I really struggled with that.  But the Lord has shown me that the little lambs are as much a part of the flock as the older sheep and that they are very valuable to the Good Shepherd.  One of the best ways I personally can minister to the adults in our assembly is by loving their children and working alongside them as parents to see their children saved and built up in their personal relationship with the Lord.  And helping strengthen the families in our local church is also a help to my husband in his work as an elder.

Perhaps you have the gift of evangelism and God uses you to share the gospel and see people saved and brought into your local fellowship.  Maybe God has given you a ministry of counseling people one-on-one, or a ministry of visitation to provide comfort and encouragement to the believers.  I will never forget how much it meant it to me when I had three children ages 4 and under, to have one of the elder’s wives come to my house during my kids’ nap time once a week just to pray with me.  Now that she’s elderly and unable to get out as much, I am able to return that blessing, and go visit her in her home so we can pray together. 

God has equipped us each individually for the “good works which He prepared beforehand that we should walk in them.” (Ephesians 2:10)  There is no particular ministry that the Scriptures declare to be the job of the elders’ wives.  One thing that is certain is that God will not give you a ministry that will be in competition with or detract from your husband’s- but will in fact, enhance his ministry because God has called the two of you to serve together as one.