Helping Your Husband Stay Pure

We are continuing to look at some of the qualifications for men who would serve as elders in the local church, and think about how our actions and attitudes as wives can affect our husband’s effectiveness in those areas.  

1 Timothy 3:2

An overseer then must be blameless, the husband of one wife, temperate, sober-minded, of good behavior, hospitable, able to teach.  

The Husband of One Wife 

One of your responsibilities as a wife is to do what you can to help your husband stay morally pure.  My husband has to travel for his job and I know that many husbands also travel for ministry.  If you’re able to travel with your husband, do it.  Sometimes you are in a situation where you can’t- for example if you have family responsibilities that keep you at home.  If you can’t be with your husband, it is important to communicate daily.  We have an enemy who is trying to destroy our marriages.  Don’t give him the opportunity.  My husband tells me that when he’s away from home, he just needs to know that everything’s okay between us.  A phone call, a text, an email saying, “I love you.  I’m praying you.  We all miss you.”  A note stuck in his suitcase.  Those are small things, but they go a long way in helping your husband in the area of moral purity.  Show affection to him when he’s home.  I know that sometimes when my husband is gone for a few days and gets home, my response is not “Oh, my wonderful husband is home!”; instead, it’s, “Finally!  Your children have been driving me crazy!” He may have been at a place where people appreciated him and made him feel very special.  Don’t let him feel less appreciated at home. 

Not only does he need your physical affection, he needs your emotional support.  The Lord’s work is work.  It can be very draining.  It’s easy to get discouraged.  That’s one reason God has given you to your husband.  Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 says, “Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labor.  For if they fall, one will lift up his companion.  But woe to him who is alone when he falls, for he has no one to help him up.”  Ask the Lord to help you be the wife your husband needs in this area.  If things aren’t going well in your marriage, it will affect your entire ministry- individually and as a couple.